Today we celebrated Christmas. It was rough. We spent the day at Rick and Julies. It was warm and sunny. It didn't feel like Christmas. It's hard to know how to be happy at family events. Try as we might to keep smiling for the kids they were empty and unheartfelt smiles. How do you keep going after the loss of something so wonderful. I am just the aunt. When I see my brother and his wife and my nieces and nephew, my heart aches. I know how hard everyday is for me, I just can't imagine what they are feeling. I feel her presence every where and try to use that to stay sane and happy. To try to be a good mom and wife. There are good days now, I feel like I am making some progress, but holidays just hurt.
Hug your loved ones an extra time and hold on a minute longer, because you just never know.
Merry Christmas.
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